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I can only recall our good times. Were they ever real? Or is this an unconscious attempt by my mind to protect me from the pain of loss?Anger-We are told Anger is a common response when faced with significant decisions in which a person has little or no perceived input and will have a potentially negative effect. These circumstances often generate feelings of helplessness, which can fuel an individual's anger. But I was not prepared for the white hot anger that blotted out even my vision. A primal urge to kill, crush, destroy! Even thoughts of jail are forgotten, only the conscious decision of what will become of my children if I'm incarcerated keeps me from doing great bodily harm. Staying away from her at this point is a form of self-protection for all of us.Bargaining-I would make a deal with the devil to go back in time and stop her affair before it started. But there is not a way to unfuck the guy my wife was with. Maybe therapy? Is there some kind of penance I can do to make. It was from Alisa. "Are y'all free to get some lunch and go do something today?"I heard Kitten ask who it was as I replied. "Maybe around dinner time? Kitten is a bit tied up right now." I set the phone down on the desk against the wall she was facing and returned my attention to her."It was Alisa asking if we wanted to go out today. I told her you were tied up but maybe for dinner or something." She smiled and nodded at my answer while I worked on her other wrist. The phone buzzed again while I was inspecting my handy work and questioning her making sure nothing was feeling uncomfortable.Alisa had texted, "Ohh! Can I see?" "Baby girl?" I spoke softly pulling her chin up to look at me. "Alisa wants to see your current predicament. Can I send a picture to her? It's up to you." I could feel her face heat up at my question and see her eyebrows furrow in thought. She was still wearing her panties and crop top so nothing would be shown but I wasn't about to do send something this intimate.
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